Academia: Shamanism and the Near Death Experience

Posted on June 12, 2024 by raine.clara.shakti

This paper was written as part of my thanatology degree
Class: Afterlife Beliefs Across Cultures
Submission date: April 10, 2023

We live in ordinary reality, a reality we are comfortable with, a mundane reality full of trips to the grocery store, paying taxes, and other ordinary activities. However, there is another reality beyond the edges of our consciousness called nonordinary reality, which is a dimension outside, but parallel to, the confines of ordinary awareness (Bowles, 2014). Shamans deliberately travel to nonordinary reality and, based on stories of near-death experiences (NDEs), there is a belief among some scholars that people experiencing a near death experience also journey to nonordinary reality (Harner M., 1987, pp. 5-6;Ring, 1990, pp. 208-209).

Although shamanic journeys and the experiences of people who have near death experiences, known as NDErs, are similar there are key differences. In the remainder of this paper, I will define the shamanic and NDE experiences, and explore similarities and differences in how shamans and NDErs are called to, enter, experience, heal in, and, exit nonordinary reality.

Shamanism and Near Death Experiences Defined

Shamanism Defined

Shamans are men and women who travel to other worlds using what Eliade (1972) termed “techniques of ecstasy” that other healers, such as magicians and medicine men, do not utilize (p. 6-7). Shamans heal the living and the dead through journeys to nonordinary reality. They heal the living by performing soul retrievals where they reconnect people with pieces of their soul that have been lost or stolen and by extracting energy thrown at them by accident or ill will (Winkleman 2017, 52-53). They heal the dead by serving as psychopomps and accompanying their souls to the “Realm of Shadows” (Eliade 1972, 8). They also heal their communities by bringing knowledge and mediating between the spirits and humanity (Eliade, 1972, p. 233).

Although the word shaman has Russian origins and there are some who argue that the only true shamans are those from that region, most anthropologists base the determination as to whether a culture is shamanic or not on whether they contain certain characteristics. These include altered states of consciousness; an initiatory crisis involving a death and rebirth experience; the belief in illness as caused by soul loss or the intrusion of objects; and visionary experiences (Winkleman 2017, 52-53).

Shamanic practices have been found in cultures around the world including Australia, Laos, Mongolia, Korea, the Americas, and Russia. Although many believe that shamanism is a relic of the past, shamanic practices continue to exist today both in unbroken traditions from indigenous cultures and in reconstituted neoshamanism. Shamans deal with matters of the soul and spirit, but shamanism is not a religion in and of itself but is a spiritual practice that is incorporated in religions around the world including Tibetan Buddhism, Christianity, Judaism and other religions (Vitebsky, 1995).

Near Death Experiences Defined

Similar to shamanism, near death experiences are a universal phenomenon and have been reported throughout history and across cultures. Shushan (2020) writes of NDEs occurring in 7^th century China, 18^th century Siberia, and the 21^st century. Just as shamanism is a spiritual experience that knows no religious bounds, near death experiences happen to people of all religious persuasions, and to those who believe in no religion at all (p. 19). There also seems to be no correlation between near death experiences and age, social standing, educational level, or income (Talbot, 1991, p. 240). Ordinary people as well as luminaries such as Thomas Edison and Ernest Hemingway have reported near death experiences (Filippo, 2006).

Although every near death experience is unique, the Near Death Experience Content (NDE-C) scale provides five factors containing 20 unique characteristics that NDEs frequently include. The five main factors are: having a sense of being beyond the normal; a sense of harmony and peacefulness; insights into one’s life and one’s future; a sense of reaching a border, which can include a knowing that one has died and a sense of nonexistence; and a sense of reaching or passing through a tunnel or gateway (Martial, et al., 2020, pp. 8-9)

Calls to Nonordinary Reality

One of the key differences between shamans and those who experience near death experiences is that shamans are called to nonordinary reality and undergo initiatory rituals before journeying into other realms. However, those who have near death experiences are not given any time to prepare but are plunged into nonordinary reality after their bodies die or are close to death. However, while there is no prior call to an NDE, there is some evidence that a near death experience may be a call to shamanism.

How Shamans are Called to Nonordinary Reality

The path to shamanism varies by culture as in some cultures the role is hereditary, in others it is passed to an initiate chosen by an older shaman, and in still others it is believed that the spirits choose shamans by giving them an initiatory challenge, such as physical or mental illness, that they can choose to accept or refuse. If they choose to refuse the challenge, the spirits will continue to push until they eventually say yes (Vitebsky 1995, 57). It is through this initiatory illness that shamans obtain their power (Kinsley 1996, 14).

After accepting their calling as a shaman, shamans in many cultures go on a solitary journey or vision quest to meet their spirit guides. Sometimes these quests lead the neophyte shaman into the wilderness or the mountains. Many initiatory shamanic journeys involve a symbolic death and letting go of old personality and character traits that no longer serve the individual. Becoming and being a shaman is a difficult path and many shamans would not have embarked upon the path if the gods had not insisted. Shamans are often known as wounded healers due to the experiences they have had to endure to become shamans. The challenges that a shaman endures leads them to experience a profound compassion for others. (Ingerman and Wesselman, 2010, 5).

Near Death Experiences as Initiatory Call for Shamans

A core component shamanism, according to Winkelman (2012), is an initiatory experience that includes a death and rebirth experience (p. 52). This death and rebirth experience may include visions of death and dismemberment (Jokic, 2008, p. 39). There are stories of shamanic initiation that are very similar to near death experiences. A Yakut legend recounts that shamanic initiates die and battle the soul of their adversary in nonordinary reality. A story from a Samoyed shaman tells of neophyte shamans lying unconscious for several days while their spirits journey to the underworld. The Buryat culture has stories of sickness-dreams among shamanic candidates where candidates’ souls leave their bodies and journey (Eliade, 1972, pp. 33-42). In a more modern-day case of a near death experience, Green (1998) recounts the story of Mary who had a near death experience and afterward as able to connect with and gain guidance from the spirit world.

In reading stories that are classified as near death experiences, there are similar to the initiatory experiences of shamans. Thespesius died in 81 CE and spent three days in nonordinary reality where he was shown worlds of reward and punishment and was inspired to change his life for the better. Similarly, a Spanish monk named Peter died in 581 CE and was shown the torments of hell and was told by an angel to live a better life (Shushan, 2022, pp. 24-25). These experiences seem similar to the initiatory death and rebirth experiences of shamans and it could be that both Thespesius and Peter returned to live a better that life that included additional shamanic journeys to nonordinary reality.

One of the grislier components of a shamanic initiation is visions and dreams of being dismembered or of being a skeleton. In one graphic description from Yakut, a shamanic candidate has visions of dying, being cut into pieces, his bones scraped clean, and his eyes being torn from his sockets. After his body is dismembered, it is put back together and the pieces fastened together with iron (Eliade, 1972, p. 36). Similar to shamanic initiatory experiences, there are near death experiences where a person experiences the breakdown of their physical body. In a legend from Koita a man returned to his body after it had begun to decay (Shushan, 2022, p. 121). In another story from Hawaii, a man returned to return to his body because it had begun to decay and smell bad (Shushan, 2022, p. 110). Although there is clearly a difference between deliberate dismemberment and natural decay, the similarity is that both shamanic initiates and NDErs were forced to confront their bodies in less than perfect conditions and both returned to ordinary reality after having confronted their own mortality.

Entering Nonordinary Reality

Nonordinary reality is typically considered to include the lower world, the middle world, and the upper world. The lower world is similar to the world we live in, but it may be populated by mystical creatures like dragons and fairies. It is the place where our ancestors are thought to live. The middle world is the spiritual shadow of the world we inhabit. And the upper world is a place of celestial beings and higher consciousness (Harner M., 1990). Although Shamans can choose to enter the lower, the middle, or the upper world, based on descriptions of NDEs, it appears that NDErs typically enter the middle or lower worlds.

How Shamans Enter Nonordinary Reality

To journey to nonordinary reality, shamans first enter an altered state of consciousness. Shamans prepare for this altered state of consciousness in a variety of ways including fasting, water deprivation, extreme exercise, celibacy, sleep deprivation, or social isolation (Winkelman M, 2013, pp. 48-49). This altered state of consciousness can be entered through drumming, singing, chanting, or ecstatic dancing. In some cultures, psychoactive substances such as peyote are used. During altered states of consciousness or journeys, shamans are aware that their spirit has left their body and they know they have left ordinary reality behind (Eliade, 1972).

The rituals used to induce the altered state of consciousness vary by culture. For instance, Bayar Odun, a hereditary shaman from Mongolia, enters an altered state of consciousness by first bowing to the four directions, then drums and chants until she enters the state of ecstasy required for journeys to other lands (Tedlock, 2005, pp. 95-96). Ostyak shamans enter a shamanic state by first fasting all day, then eating three to seven psychedelic mushrooms to induce a deep sleep during which they will journey to nonordinary reality (Eliade, 1972, pp. 220-221).

Once a shaman leaves ordinary reality and enters nonordinary reality, he will enter the lower, the middle, or the upper world. The entrance to nonordinary reality is typically a place that exists in both ordinary and nonordinary reality. For instance, Native American shamans in California used a hollow tree trunk or a hot springs as an entrance to the lower world while the Zuni people of North America used a hole in the ground to access the lower world (Harner, 1990, pp. 35-26). Access to the upper world is typically through climbing a tree or a ladder (Eliade, 1972) and the middle world, which represents the spiritual side of ordinary reality, can be accessed by shifting consciousness the spiritual dimensions of ordinary reality (Terravera, n.d.). Shamans typically describe entering nonordinary reality through a tunnel, which seems to expand or contract as necessary (Harner, 1990).

Near Death Journeys to Nonordinary Reality

Although every near death experience is unique, The NDE-C scale lists three characteristics that are directly related to entering nonordinary reality and that directly correspond with shamanic experiences: having an out-of-body experience; having the sensation of leaving the earthly realm; and seeing or entering a gateway. (Martial, et al., 2020).

NDErs from many cultures and many times include stories of entering nonordinary reality by leaving one’s body and the earthly realm during near death experiences. In 203 C.E., Vibia Perpetua and Saturus had a shared near death experience while awaiting execution. After suffering from extreme deprivation, Saturus wrote that they had died and were being carried east by angels toward a bright light (Shushan, 2022, pp. 55-56). A Maori man reported that his aunt had had an out of body experience where she left ordinary reality by climbing down a vine and then flew back to her body (Shushan, 2022, p. 116). A 19^th century legend from Oahu tells of Kane who left the earthly realm for a land of abundance and joy (Shushan, 2022, p. 110). Although some NDErs report seeing their body immediately after leaving, other NDErs have reported looking down upon their decomposing corpses (Shushan, 2022, pp. 111,119). In a more recent case, Mary, who was mentioned above, was in a severe automobile accident in 1992 and she reported leaving her body and looking down to see her body on the ground (Green, 1998).

The sensation of traveling through a tunnel is another characteristic that shamans and NDErs experience. Two recent NDErs experienced traveling through a tunnel into a light filled space. In 2020, a case of Covid-19 brought Randy Schiefer to the brink of death. He was in a medically induced coma when his consciousness traveled through a tunnel to a beautiful room filled with love and light (Hale, 2022). Our 1992 accident victim, Mary, also traveled through a tunnel to a realm of light (Green, 2001).

Experiencing Nonordinary Reality

After entering nonordinary reality, shamans and NDErs may encounter a reality that looks very similar to everyday reality (the middle world) or a world filled with celestial beings, dragons, and the spirits of the dead.

Shaman’s Experience of Nonordinary Reality

Shamans navigate nonordinary reality based on knowledge provided by their teachers and knowledge gained through their own journeys (Eliade, 1972). One reason that shamans always enter nonordinary reality through the same reference point is that by doing so they can build a map of their journeys (Hirsch, n.d.). In some instances, shamans are also guided by power animals. During their visits to nonordinary reality, shamans may encounter the spirits of the departed, demons, angels, and other otherworldly beings (Eliade, 1972).

My Shamanic Experiences

Nonordinary reality is something that can seem fantastical to those who have not experienced it, but my own experiences in nonordinary reality through shamanic journeying have helped me to see that there may be more to life than the ordinary. My first journey to nonordinary reality occurred during a guided meditation at a workshop. This experience led me to seek out more information about journeying and shamanism and led me to The Way of the Shaman. Drumming has been a traditional way to reach nonordinary reality for shamans across the centuries (Eliade, 1972) and Harner recommended purchasing a recording of drumming with a rapid beat at the end serving as a callback feature (Harner M. , 1987, p. 145).

Caves have long served as the starting point for shamanic journeys into the underworld (Eliade, 1972) (Harner M. , 1987) and Harner suggested visualizing and entering a cave that exists in ordinary reality. I chose to use Mammoth Cave as my entry into the underworld and as I listened to the beat of the drum, I visualized walking into the cave.

As I entered the cave, I realized it was different than the times I had visited in ordinary reality where there is simply a great rotunda with numerous passageways. In nonordinary reality, there is an island surrounded by a stream. On the island there is a pregnant goddess who whispered to me to lay down all my troubles and burdens. Once I put down my burdens, she provided guidance and pointed me toward a pathway. As I walked, I realized that in nonordinary reality I was able to walk through walls and that I intuitively knew which direction to take. I received messages from spirit the first time I visited nonordinary reality. My experiences in nonordinary reality are similar to those described by both ancient (Eliade, 1972) and modern (Harner M. 1987) shamans as I entered nonordinary reality, encountered spirits, and was provided guidance.

I have also had soul retrievals that have brought me healing. One of the hallmarks of shamanism is a belief that illness can be caused by soul loss and that healing can be brought about by soul retrieval (Winkleman, 2012, p. 52). During a soul retrieval, shamans journey into the underworld where they search for pieces of an individual’s soul that have been lost (Eliade, 1972, p. 300). During a typical journey, the shaman enters nonordinary reality, meets his spirit helpers who help direct him to the soul parts that have been lost, and he helps them understand why it is important to return. The shaman will typically blow the retrieved soul parts back into the individual. One the shaman has returned to ordinary reality; he will tell his client about the journey. People who have undergone soul retrievals typically feel more whole and restored afterwards (Lindquist, 2004). My soul retrieval followed a similar trajectory and when my shaman returned to ordinary reality, he described a journey that was typical for a soul retrieval and he told me things he would have had no way of knowing.

Near Death Experiences in Nonordinary Reality

While NDErs do not have prior knowledge of nonordinary reality or the ability to rely on maps created by others, there experiences in nonordinary reality are similar to that of shamans in several key ways as evidenced by characteristics of the NDE-C: they have an enhanced sense of understanding, they encounter beings from other realms or dead relatives, and they know things they could have no way of knowing in ordinary reality (Martial, et al., 2020).

In 81 C.E. Thespesius died and returned to life three days later. Like many NDErs he reported leaving his body and traveled to a place of stars where he met deceased relatives and one of these relative took him on a tour of places of both punishment and reward (Shushan, 2022, pp. 24-25). In another example of encountering spirits of the dead, Quetzalpetlatl died in the 15^th century and was led to a joyous land of the dead where she met dead relatives and was given the power to heal and told to return to her people (Shushan, 2022, p. 54). One NDEr who was given information he could not have known through any other means was a Mormon man who died in 1923 and encountered his dead daughter who told him that it was not his time because his son, his mother, and his wife had to die before him. He returned to Earth and his family died in exactly that sequence (Shushan, 2022, p. 54).

In a case that blends the near-death experience with shamanism, Mary, our accident victim, encountered the spirit of her dead friend Frank during her near-death experience. He told her that she had to return to the land of the living, but through dreams and other experiences he continued to guide and help her. In one incident he told her where to find something she had lost over a year ago and there was no way other than through her otherworldly encounter that she could have known where it was (Green, 2001).

Healing in Nonordinary Reality

Nonordinary reality is a place where the normal rules of healing do not apply. While both shamans and NDErs can find healing in nonordinary reality, there are key differences. Shamans typically heal others or their communities, while the healing brought by NDErs is mostly self-healing.

Shamanic Healing in Nonordinary Reality

Shamans are healers who believe that illnesses can be caused by both ordinary and spiritual means including soul loss, spiritual attacks by spirits or sorcerers, and the intrusion of objects (Winkleman 2013, 52-53). Shamans are also diagnosticians and typically diagnose patients either by reviewing their physical symptoms or by journeying to nonordinary reality to diagnose the patient (Kinsley 1996, 13). Typical shamanic diagnoses of living individuals are of soul loss that would be healed by a soul retrieval or the intrusion of a foreign object that would be healed by an extraction (Hultzkrantz 1981, 90).

Soul loss occurs when pieces of a person’s soul are frightened away, are taken by a spirit, or leave voluntarily. Soul loss can occur when a person undergoes trauma such as surgery, shaming, bullying, betrayal, or accidents (Wahbeh, et al. 2017, 209). To retrieve the pieces of a person’s soul, a shaman may first call to the soul to entice it to come back, but if the soul refuses to return, the shaman will go into the underworld to retrieve the soul piece and return it to the person’s body (Eliade, 1972, pp. 217-219). An extraction is necessary when dense energies caused by sorcery or unconscious or conscious thoughts take up residence in the body and interfere with a person’s normal functioning (Skelton 2010). These intrusions can be extracted physically by sucking it out, blowing it out, or massaging it away. When physically extracted, these objects take the form of a pebble, a feather, or a similar small object (Hultzkrantz 1981, 89). Modern day shamans are more likely to use vocals, drumming, or similar methods to remove intrusions (Wahbeh, et al. 2017, 209).

Shamans also serve the dead by acting as psychopomps and escorting the souls of the dead, particularly those who do not realize they are dead, to the spirit world. Shamans fill this role because they are familiar with the road to the underworld. In some cultures as the Lolo, the shaman leads all the dead to their final abode, but in other cultures the shaman only fulfills the role of psychopomp for the dead who continue to haunt the land of the living (Eliade 1972, 209). Modern day shamanic healers sometimes fulfill the role of psychopomp within a hospice setting, particularly if spirits are trapped in the land of the living (Bryan 2013, 182-183).

Shamans not only heal individuals, as community leaders they also work to heal their communities by helping hunters find prey and interceding on behalf of their community with the Gods. One example of how shamans help to heal community is the shamans of the Inuit people. For the Inuit, shamans were responsible for interceding with Sedna, mother of the sea beasts, when she withheld her sea creatures from their hunters because she was offended by the villagers’ actions. When it became clear that Sedna was offended, a shaman journeyed to Sedna’s underground home where she would share the transgressions of the community. Once the shaman returned from his journey, there would be a group confession as people shared how they had broken taboos with the community (Eliade 1972, 297).

Healing brought by Near Death Experiences

While shamans heal others and their communities, most healing that occurs as a result of an NDE is self-healing. One typical characteristic of an NDE is a life review and during these life reviews some NDErs see the error of their ways and change how they live (Martial, et al., 2020). One person who repented after an NDE was Thespesuius, a wicked and lewd man, who underwent an NDE in 81 C.E. and transformed into an honest and devout man. Similarly in 581 C.E. a Spanish monk died and saw men suffering the torments of hell. An angel sent him back to his body with instructions to live a better life (Shushan, 2022, pp. 24-25). Modern day NDErs also report positive life changes. After Schiefer’s 2020 NDE, he became more open with his family about his emotions and dedicated himself more fully to his Christian faith (Hale, 2022).

Like shamans, NDErs sometimes return with skills or messages that can help heal their communities. Quetzalpetlatl, who underwent an NDE in the 15^th century, returned from nonordinary reality with the ability to heal the sick. Similarly, English astronomer and explorer Thomas Hariot reported accounts by the Algonquin people of two men who had near death experiences, but returned to provide guidance to their people on how to avoid a hellish fate (Shushan, 2022, pp. 24-26).

Exiting Nonordinary Reality

While shamans have a more clearly defined and similar path to entering nonordinary reality, NDErs have more defined paths out of nonordinary reality as most are either told to go back or are forced back into their bodies.

How Shamans Return from Nonordinary Reality

The return to ordinary reality depends very much on the culture. Modern day shamans typically return when their assistant begins drumming rapidly to signal that it is time for them to return (Harner, 1990). However, indigenous shamans return to ordinary reality in a variety of ways. The Inuit sense a shaman’s return by shaking in the floor and walls. There is also a belief among the Inuit that eating food in nonordinary reality will make it hard to return to ordinary reality (Eliade, 1972, p. 288).

Returning from Near Death Experiences

People who have near death experiences often feel a sense of great peace and happiness in nonordinary reality (Martial, et al., 2020) and are often reluctant to leave. In many instances, NDErs are told that it is not their time and that they must return to ordinary reality. Mary, who had an NDE after a car accident, had a second NDE after she was hospitalized. During the first NDE she went into white light, but her friend Frank told her that she must return. She willingly returned at the end of her first NDE, but she was more reluctant to return after her second NDE and only agreed to return after Frank showed her all the prayers she had ever prayed (Green, 2001). In other instances, people return because they have been told they need to be there for their relatives or that it is not their time to die (Shushan, 2022). In some older stories of near death experiences, NDErs who are reluctant to return to their bodies, are forced back into their bodies by the spirits or by shamans (Shushan, 2022).

Conclusion

While there are important differences between shamanic and near death experiences, there are enough similarities to conclude that there is a high probability that the nonordinary reality experienced by shamans and NDErs is the same. The key difference between shamans and people having near death experiences how they enter and exit nonordinary reality. Shamans, deliberately enter nonordinary reality by entering an altered state of consciousness. While in nonordinary reality, they are able to navigate non-ordinary reality to complete healing tasks such as soul retrievals and guiding souls. Shamans also choose when to exit nonordinary reality. (Winkleman, 2012). In contrast, NDErs are thrust into nonordinary reality after their bodies die. In some NDEs they are guided by spirits or they wander through the afterlife, but they do not usually have the same sense of purpose that shamans have (Shushan, 2022).

While there are key differences between shamanic journeys and NDEs, there are far more similiarites that differences. Both NDErs and Shamans descriptions of nonordinary reality are similar, both recount entering nonordinary reality through a tunnel or other gateway, both are aware that they are out of their bodies, and both are able to travel through nonordinary reality similar to how they navigate in this plane. Another commonality is encountering spirits in nonordinary reality who provide guidance. One profound similarity between shamans and NDErs is that nonordinary reality is a healing space for both in many cases. Shamans enter non (Shushan, 2022)ordinary reality to heal others via soul retriavals, extractions, or other methods (Winkleman, 2012). NDErs often come back from nonordinary reality changed, either having learned the error of their ways or coming back with skills to help others.

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Memorial: God’s Little Acre, Newport

Posted on June 10, 2024 by raine.clara.shakti

Date Visited: March 26, 2023
Address: Farewell Street, Newport, RI 02840

As a Midwesterner, I grew up believing that slavery only happened in the South and that the northern states, especially New England, were all abolitionists at heart. That changed when I started working on a project in Rhode Island. I always like to research places if I’m going to be spending a lot of time there and I was shocked when I read Dark Work: The Business of Slavery in Rhode Island and learned that Newport was one of the busiest slave ports in the young nation. I also learned that Rhode Island outlawed slavery earlier than most states, but I did not realize what an internal struggle it was until I read Sons of Providence, a book about the Brown brothers and their role in the slave trade.

My readings, along with a course I was taking in African American Deathways as part of my thanatology degree at Marian University, inspired me to search for African American cemetaries in Rhode Island. God’s Little Acre is part of the Common Burying Ground on Farewell Street in Newport. Their website, which is run by the 1696 Project, does an excellent job of telling the history of African Americans in Rhode Island so I won’t repeat it all here, but will hit some of the highlights.

Enslaved Africans began being transported to and through Newport in the 1600s and by the time of the American Revolutionary War, Newport had a significant population of Africans who had gained their freedom. These free African-Americans created the country’s first Free African Union Society to support black people in Newport. One of the key duties of the society was to record births and deaths of African community. The society also ensured the burial of its members.

One of the unique features of God’s Little Acre is that many of the people buried there have carved tombstones, which was expensive and unusual for both free and enslaved Black people at the time. In addition to serving as monuments for the dead, these tombstones also represent some of the first signed art by African Americans. God’s Little Acre’s website includes photos of a number of gravestones. Many of the tombstones are in disrepair and some of them were carved of slate, a material that does not weather well in the harsh New England winters.

Like many Black cemeteries across the United States, God’s Little Acre fell into disrepair and it wasn’t until the 1980s that the town and civic groups began to clean it up and to refurbish gravestones. The site is featured on the National Trust for Historic Places website where you can read about efforts to refurbish the site and donate to its restoration.

My daughter and I spent a sunny afternoon in March 2023 wandering among the tombstones and imagining the people buried beneath our feet, some of whom had lived over 300 years ago. The gravestones were beautiful, but some of them were so hard to read because years of harsh New England weathers had worn away the lettering. However, even if we could not read their names, we were able to bear witness to the fact that they had lived and died.

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Movie Review: Taking Chance

Posted on June 7, 2024 by raine.clara.shakti

When a member of the US military dies in battle, their remains are transferred home for burial through a process called a dignified transfer. The body is placed in a metal casket surrounded by ice packs in the theater of battle and the military member’s peers cover the casket with a US flag, salute the casket, and place it on a military transport plane. The body is flown to Dover Air Force Base Mortuary, where it is cleaned and dressed in a dress uniform or civilian clothes, if preferred by the family. Exquisite care is taken each step of the way as the body is treated with the upmost respect and honor.

A member of the military is assigned to act as an escort for the body and accompanies the body from Dover to the service member’s home. At each step of the way, as the body is transferred, the escort salutes the body. The escort is also responsible for carrying the personal effects of the deceased service member.

Taking Chance tells the story of Lt. Col Mike Strobl who escorts PFC Chance Phelps home to Wyoming. Strobl is a military pencil pusher who served in Desert Storm, but returned stateside to become an analyst who makes manpower recommendations. Although he chose to work stateside so he could see his family every night, he is dissatisfied and feels as if he is letting other people fight the war on terror that erupted after 9/11. Although it is unusual for a senior officer to serve as a final escort for a junior officer, his boss grants his request to accompany PFC Chance Phelps home.

The movie shows the meticulous care that is taken with service members’ bodies as they are prepared for burial or cremation. Even if there will be a closed casket, the body is meticulously dressed and their ribbons are arranged with care. This movie is one of the few that makes me cry each time service members and ordinary citizens paid their respects. Baggage handlers who moved the body off and on the planes stood at attention as Strobl saluted the coffin. The captain who flew Chance on the final leg of his journey announced to his passengers that a service member was on his final journey and made sure to note Chance’s name. And as the hearse carrying Chance’s body traveled the final 90 miles from Billings, MT to his hometown, vehicles turned on their lights and created an honor guard to escort him home. Although Strobl had not known Chance in life, his platoon mates and friends from his hometown made sure that Strobl knew how special Chance was.

This movie shows the grief of a country honoring the military dead, of Chance’s friends, and final of his family who is mourning a son and brother.

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Personal: The Thought of Losing Wendy

Posted on June 5, 2024 by raine.clara.shakti

Wendy is a mulish, grey, bossy, opininated American Bully who for some strange reason has completely captured my heart. I fell in love with her six years ago when I decided we needed another dog and we went to City Dogs Cleveland with Clark to find him–and me–a companion. I fell in love with her when she tenderly kissed Clark. I knew she had recently had puppies and my tender heart imaged she viewed Clark as a substitue for her puppies. We couldn’t take her home that day because she had to be spayed, but when my daughter went back to fill out the paperwork and they put the sign on her cage saying she was adopted, she smiled and when I saw the picture I knew for sure she was the one.

Arriving at our house, she was overwhelmed and slept the whole first day. She was demure and well behaved, as if she thought if she acted out we would take her back. A year or so after we got her, we got bad news from the vet that her liver enzymes were off and learned she would have to take a drug called denemarin. It was either the denimarin or feeling comfortable in our home that had Wendy going from demure and scared of her shadow to outgoing, bossy, and puppish. She became much more playful and she started telling us what she liked and disliked. Some of this dislikes include working at the dining room table, as it is only for eathing; sitting in someone else’s chair at the dining room table; and staying in my home office too late. She also started to demand to go outside when it was sunny, just to sit and soak up the sun.

She annoys me a lot of the time because I will be in the middle of something and she’ll cry to be taken outside 15 minutes after she has come in. And there are times I snap at her, but then I remember that her time on this earth is limited and that one day I will miss the crying and that makes it so much easier to stop what I’m doing and take her out. And although I hate the fact that she gets into the garbage, I also know that there will be a day her garbage raiding exploits will be the stuff of legend, just like her big brother Luke’s butter eating is now the stuff of sweet tales of remembernce.

As the vet said she as three to five when we first got her, I know she is between nine and eleven, which means there are fewer tomorrows than there are yesterdays. It breaks my heart to know that someday, I will no longer wake up to her feet in my face, hear her screeching cries, or feel the weight of her soft head on my lap. Someday, I won’t be able to cuddle with her in the giant dog bed on the floor. I also know that the thanalogical term for what I’m feeling is anticipatory grief.

I hate knowing one day I will have to say goodbye, but it also serves as a reminder to love her as much as I can while she is still here and to make sure she knows that she is loved. We will walk, we will cuddle, and I will love her with my whole heart.

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Memorials: Knollwood Mausoleum

Posted on June 3, 2024 by raine.clara.shakti

Date Visited: June 2, 2024
Address: 1678 SOM Center Rd, Mayfield Heights, OH 44124

Knollwood Cemetery is an almost 100 acre rural/garden cemetery established in Mayfield Heights, OH in 1908. The first burials were bodies transferred from the Erie Cemetery in downtown Cleveland and the first new internment is in 1910. The mausoleum was built in 1926 and has been expanded several times since then.

The day my daughter and I went to visit Knollwood it was rainy and overcast so we decided to spend some time wandering around the mausoleum. The mausoleum is two stories and we decided to go in downstairs, then make our way upstairs. The mausoleum is huge as it has space for over 7,000 full burials and a smaller number of urns for cremains. The first thing we noticed walking in was that it was very dark and all the lights were not on. Lights were on in some hallways and not others. Additionally, there was work being done and there were slabs of marble leaning up against some walls.

There are internments along some of the walls and there are a number of small family spaces. These each have a gate, but some of the gates were open. We also noticed that some spaces had stained-glass, but seemed to have no source of light, so it was impossible to see the images. We spent about 30 minutes wandering around looking at names and dates and admiring the beautiful stained-glass. I will also be honest and say that being in large mausoleums makes me nervous and the less than optimal lighting in Knollwood made me feel a little creeped out. However, the stained-glass more than made up for my slight queasiness. It would take multiple blog posts to do justice to all of the glass, but here are some of our favorites.

I love this image because it is not expressly Christian.

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Movie: The Bucket List

Posted on May 31, 2024 by raine.clara.shakti

Carter Chambers, a blue collar mechanic who gave up his dreams of being a history professor, and Edward Cole, a four-times divorced billionaire, are an unlikely pair, except for one commonality: terminal cancer. They meet because Edward Cole, who owns the hospital they are both seeking treatment in, has decreed that there will be two patients to every room: no exceptions. Edward runs his empire from his hospital bed and Carter has loving visits from his family. While the medical staff often fawns over Edward, Carter’s medical needs are sometimes neglected until Edward orders the doctors to take care better care of him.

Carter loves his family, but sitting alone in the hospital room, he begins to have regrets about the things he did not do with his life. While he is a gifted amateur historian, he gave up his dreams to start a family. In the hospital, he begins a list of things to do before kicking the bucket including driving a Shelby Mustang and witnessing something truly majestic. When he learns that he has less than a year to live, he crumples the list and throws it away. Edward finds the list and convinces Carter to go on a round the world tour to complete a joint bucket list.

Despite his wife Vivian’s objections, Carter and Edward hip in Edward’s private jet and start their trek around the world. They go skydiving, race vintage cards around California speedway, eat dinner at a famous French restaurant, visit the Taj Mahal and trek to Mount Everest, although the weather is too bad to see the peaks. Along the way, we get to know these two diverse characters and their hopes, joys, and regrets. We learn that Edward is grieving his relationship with his estranged daughter and that Carter feels he is falling out of love with his wife.

After Edward hires a prostitute to seduce Carter, Carter realizes he really does love his wife and asks to go home. On the way home, Carter attempts to reunite Edward with his estranged daughter, but Edward considers that a betrayal. Carter is reunited with his loving family, and Edward goes home to cry alone over the mess he has made of his life. It is only after Carter collapses and later dies in surgery that Edward realizes that Carter was probably his best friend in the world and he eulogizes him by saying the last three months of Carter’s life were the best of his. The movie ends years later when Edward’s assistant treks to the top of a mountain to leave Edward’s ashes besides Carter’s.

The specter of death hangs over all of us and we should all make the most of the time we have on this earth. However, The Bucket List brings the fragility of life into sharp focus as two men facing their own mortality realize they still have things left to accomplish. Although some may find it strange that Carter chose to spend his last few months with a virtual stranger instead of his own family, I found it completely understandable for several reasons. The first is that he and Edward had a shared fate, as both of them had a fatal diagnosis. This meant that neither was going to baby the other, instead they were just two guys out to see the world and allowed them to both focus on living instead of dying. If Carter had stayed home, his family’s instinct would have been to baby him and take care of him instead of focusing on life.

The second is that Carter needed distance from his wife and family to truly come to appreciate them. If he had chosen to stay home, he may have become resentful because his wife was–once again–keeping him from living life on his terms. By having his grand adventure, he came to appreciate the love and comfort his wife brought him. This allowed his last few days at home to be filled with joy instead of resentment.

From a thanatological perspective, anticipatory grief was an overriding theme in this movie. Carter and Edward were both anticipating their own deaths and, for Carter, the grief his family would feel without him. Carter’s family was also facing life without their patriarch and anticipating the changes that his death would bring.

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Memorials: Being Buried with Your People

Posted on May 29, 2024 by raine.clara.shakti

A question was asked at a Death Cafe I participated in earlier this week about whether or not it mattered where you were buried. Should you be buried somewhere you had a plot? Should you be buried near family? Or did it really matter? If you would have asked me a few years ago, I would have said it didn’t really matter where you were buried as there was a good chance that after a generation or so your family wouldn’t come visit because they would have all scattered.

That opinion changed after I went searching for my grandmother’s grave in Poplar Bluff, MO. I planned a work trip so that I could drive home through Poplar Bluff, the town my daddy grew up in. I made my way to the cemetery and as I’d never visited my grandmother’s grave, I had to stop by the office to ask someone to show me the way. A very kind gentleman led me to my grandmother’s grave and took a moment to sweep the dust off before beckoning me over. As we stood there in awkward silence, he asked if she was buried “by her people” and the question took me aback. I knew that her husband, who had died 60 years, before was buried in Alton with my father, but I didn’t know if she was buried by any of her relatives.

I took a moment to look at the graves around her and noticed that Juanita Digges Collins was buried nearby and recognized the name. Juanita was my aunt who had died six years before I was born at the age of 26. I realized that since she was buried with her people, my grandmother was by extension buried with her extended family and not just surrounded by strangers. Although my logical brain told me that this really didn’t matter as they were dead, it touched my soul and made me smile a bit thinking of my grandmother in heaven surrounded by her people.

My grandfather’s tomb. To the best of my knowledge, the tombstone was added years after he died by his family. I found it sad that hsi roles as husband and father were not acknowledged.

As I drove north the next day, I decided to stop by the Alton cemetery, where my father and grandfather were buried. I remembered a similar trip to visit my grandfather I’d made years earlier when I was working at nearby Scott Air Force Base. I’d sat on the grave of the grandfather I had never met and told him about my life. I shared my hopes, my dreams, and my sorrows with him. I remember feeling better when I left as if I had been listened to and heard.

This photo was taken in March 2009 when we took my father’s cremains to be interred. I believe his death date has since been added.

I couldn’t find my father’s or grandfather’s grave this trip, but I know I was close as they were buried near Robert Wadlow, who at just about 8 feet tall is the world’s tallest man. I sat on the bumper of my car in the rain and talked and cried and it felt nice to be with “my people” and to tell them my hopes and dreams. Rationally, I know that I was standing in a cemetery talking to myself, but my heart felt a little lighter and that it was kind of nice to know my daddy was buried with his father and that I could go visit my people when I felt the need to.

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Memorial Day 2024

Posted on May 27, 2024 by raine.clara.shakti

Mermorial Day is an interesting holiday for me. I truly give thanks for those who have made the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom and there is something about the solemnity of national cemeteries like the Ohio Reserve National Cemetery that fills me with sadness and patriotism. However, I also know we have fought wars for motivations that were less than pure. I used to think that Revolutionary War heros were the ultimate as they were bad ass and scrappy and went against the world’s greatest army in pursuit of our freedom. However, as I dive deeper into the history of our country, I realize that these heroes were conquerors who vanquished and murdered the original occupants of our land.

The one thing that keeps me from denouncing them is thinking about how our soldiers returning from Vietnam were treated. These men, many of them more men than boys, did what their country asked of them. Many of them were drafted. Many of them truly believed they were fighting for democracy. The thought of these young men returning home to the scorn of a nation, helps me remember that things are rarely black and white and that there are many shades of gray.

With that in mind, I want to pay tribute to the men and women of our armed forces who have fought bravely and gallantly for our freedom. One of these men is Captain John Trevett who served in the Revolutionary War. My daughter and I discovered his grave when we were wandering around God’s Little Acre, the African American cemetery in Newport, Rhode Island, and it’s adjoining cemetery, the Common Burying Ground. We were in awe that beneath our feet was someone who had fought against the British for our freedom. We paused to say thanks and my daughter read the stirring inscription out loud.

In memory of Captain John Trevett, who departed this life November 5th, 1823, aged 76. He was a true patriot of the Revolution and served his country faithfully from the commencement to the close of that war and was honored with various commissions in the Navy. Was three times at the capture of New Providence. He was in many serious engagements and received several severe wounds in the cause of independence. He received as his only reward the satisfaction of reflecting that by his efforts he had contributed to the establishment of the blood, bought liberties of his country.

Also of Elizabeth, his amiable consort and daughter of the late Captain John Holmes Gardner, who departed this life January 22nd, 1823, age 70. 1. And Captain Constant Church Trevet also Captain Eliezer Trevett, both of whom died in the cause of the country aboard the British prison ship near New York, at the close of the war.

Despite knowing the horrors of the Revolutionary War, thge phrase “blood bought liberties of his country” makes me tear up every time I hear it.

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Books: Over My Dead Body

Posted on May 24, 2024 by raine.clara.shakti

Link: Over My Dead Body

There are over 144,000 cemeteries in the United States, according to author Greg Melville, and he’s visited a lot of them and cataloged some of his visits in Over My Dead Body. ALthough some books about cemeteries are staid recitations of who is buried where, Melville works to make his book entertaining and to provide not only facts by social commentary.

He starts with a visit to Jamestown and recounts the tragic history of the town including how there is evidence that people desperate for food canibalized the dead. Melville also contrasts the hastily created mass graves of the European invaders with the elaborate and well planned burials of the Native Alquonqin people.

Melville’s balanced look at the graves of the European conquers with the people they abused and took advantage of, including Native Americans and Africans, continues as he moves on to Plymouth where he details how the English robbed corn from the graves of the Wampanoag people. He also compares how rich slave owners, such as Thomas Jefferson, have elaborate memorials while the bodies of the enslaved are hidden.

Melville’s book is not only full of civics lessons, it also details how cemeteries evolved and greew over the centuries going from small family or church yard plots to elaborate parks full of tree lined boulevards. He concludes his look at America’s cemetaries by looking to the future and examining columbariums where the urns of the deceased are memoralized and green cemeteries.

This book is a fun read and it packs a lot of history within its pages. Highly recommended for anyone who is fascinated by death and cemetaries.

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Academia: Letter to Myself

Posted on May 22, 2024 by raine.clara.shakti

This was an assignment for a class in death and dying.

Original Submission date: September 4, 2019

Dearest Raine,

As stereotypical as it might sound, I’m staring death in the face but choosing to turn around and look back over my life and one of the things that stands out is how much key events in my life like Cam’s walk to Navy Pier and Luke’s death really made me aware of my own mortality and the mortality of those around me and made me realize how important it was to truly be present for those we love. I’m chuckling as I realize, that my master’s work at WMU foretold this looking back as I can clearly remember Dr. V. saying in her lecture that the elderly took time to reconcile their lives to determine if they’ve had a good life. I think I’ve had a good life, but thinking about that class has also made me think about how my viewpoints of death have changed over the years.

As a child, it was not death that scared me, but the rapture as every summer we would go to church and see a movie about the rapture and I would end up in tears because I was terrified that Jesus would swoop down and take away everyone I loved and I would be left alone. My first real memory of death was when I was nine and my Grandpa Tony died. He wasn’t my real grandfather, but his wife (Grandma Elda) had babysat me from when I was six months old so he had been a constant in my life. I didn’t truly understand what death was, but I was sad that my Grandma Elda was so sad and I remember hugging her and telling her I loved her.

When I was ten, my cousin Randy tried to kiss me in the hayloft and I never told anyone. I honestly don’t think it went any further than that, but it made me so uncomfortable that I never wanted to see him again. When I was twelve, my parents were talking about taking Randy in to live with us because his father was abusive. I remember being terrified of what would happen if he lived in our tiny house with us, but I still never said anything to my parents. A few weeks after that conversation, on my mother’s birthday, Randy was killed when he fell into a silo full of corn and suffocated. I remember being relieved that he wasn’t going to live with us, but feeling so guilty and feeling as if I had caused his death because I was selfish and didn’t want him to live in my house. Looking back to that long-ago lecture on death attitudes, I remember Dr. V. saying that it is normal for children to think a death is their fault. Please don’t feel guilty about his death as we had a legitimate reason to not want him to live with us and we had nothing to do with his death.

The next two significant deaths I experienced were separated by twenty years and both had profound effects on me as they made me think about love and loss. Our grandmother suffered from Alzheimer’s and she was in a home for the aged for a few years prior to her death. Several times over the course of those few years, we would get a call from my uncle saying she was near death and that we needed to rush to Poplar Bluff to say our goodbyes. I remember spending our 20^th birthday visiting my grandmother and watching as my father, with tears in his eyes, told her he loved her and told me to never be ashamed to tell people that you loved them. Watching my father cry was heartbreaking and a reminder that love hurts. My father died in 2010 after bravely battling lung cancer for a year or so. I was working on a project in Georgia at the time and I’d visit as often as I could and every time I visited him, I made sure to tell him how much I loved him. He died the day after Thanksgiving and I drove out there to be with my mother and when I arrived I found she hadn’t had his body moved from the nursing home as she wanted to give my brother and me a chance to say good bye. It was difficult to see my father’s lifeless body laying there and I was too afraid to touch him to say goodbye. The next few days were spent helping my mother deal with funeral arrangements and her new status as a widow. The hardest moment of that period was watching her throw her body over my father’s during her last goodbye before he was cremated and realizing the finality of death.

I never truly mourned my father when he died because I was busy being strong for everyone else. I had to be strong for my kids, I had to be strong for my mother, and I had to be strong for my husband. It felt like I could never mourn because I was too busy taking care of everyone else. Oddly, that’s something else that Dr. V. touched on in her lecture when she said that middle age was about thinking about responsibilities toward others and whether they would be able to carry on. A year after my daddy died, my husband had a heart attack and I spent hours by his bedside being strong and more hours walking the streets of Chicago crying and praying. Three months after his heart attack, he decided he wanted to leave and start a new life and I fell apart. I was mourning the death of my father, the death of my marriage, and worrying about what was next in my life. It was then that I realized that the death of relationships and ideals were just as painful as the deaths of people. I also realized that not taking time to grieve, doesn’t mean the grief evaporates, it is still there and it will eventually come out.

The death of elders makes you realize that you are one step closer to your own mortality, but the death of someone your age smacks you upside the head and makes you realize that you’re not invincible. The first time someone my age died was right after high school when a classmate of mine died in a military training accident. To see someone my age laid out in a box was disconcerting, but the mind is a great rationalizer and the fact that he died in a military barracks in a world far removed from my safe rural upbringing had me convinced his death was an anomaly and that I was still invincible. When my favorite cousin died in 2014, death came into my inner circle as someone I had spent my childhood laughing with first became a specter of his former self, then passed away leaving his young children behind. We had lost touch and I didn’t hear about his passing immediately, but when I did it was as if I could no longer hear the laughter of my younger self as if those memories weren’t real and as if death had intruded where it had no right to be.

It’s odd how life and memory is not a linear thing as Mark’s death was in a way the death of my childhood, but our daughter’s childhood had been marred by death many years before Mark died. Her best friend died when the girls were six and I remember Mackenzie’s wake and funeral like it was yesterday. Cam gave Mackenzie’s father a little butterfly and he put it in the casket with her and I remember crying as that butterfly was on her shoulder and her father kept stroking her body as he talked to mourners. My heart broke even more at the site of all those children dressed in their best sitting at the altar mourning their friend. I knew then that death could take even children, but I still felt mine were immune as we had asked Anubis to stay by them and protect them. It wasn’t until Cam was 20 that I realized that she could also be taken from me way too young. She had a psychotic break from reality and decided to walk the three miles from our house to Navy Pier in the middle of the night on the coldest day of the year. She called me and told me she was at Navy Pier, but I didn’t realize at the time how sick she was until she got home. It was then that all the things that could have gone wrong hit me: she could have frozen to death as she was wearing a light coat, she could have been harmed by someone, she could have fallen off the pier into the viciously cold water. However, none of those things happened and she encountered a kind security guard who let her into the pier at the risk of his own job and stayed with her until he could help her to safety. I cried in gratitude when she got home and thanked Anubis for once again doing his job.

Children and animals are innocents and I’ve had many pets die over the course of my life, but it was the death of my dog Luke that taught me the spirituality of death. I was never present when other pets died as my parents shielded me from death when I was younger and when I was older one pet was hit by a car and another died at the vet’s of an epileptic seizure. Luke was different though as he had been my reason for living after I was divorced. It was just him and I in an apartment and while I didn’t so much care about taking care of myself, I did want to make sure he was well cared for. He nursed me through the divorce and moved with me multiple times. The final move being a move to Cleveland, OH with my young adult children as we decided we wanted to escape the high costs and crime in Chicago. Luke had two years in Cleveland, two years with a big back yard, two years of a big house to run through, and a final two years of love. Our son was going back to Chicago the last weekend of July and Luke insisted on going with me to take him to the train station on Friday night. And he insisted on going upstairs to sleep in my room on Saturday night, even though he hadn’t climbed those stairs in a few months. Our daughter and I awoke to a dog in distress. He was weak and woozy and couldn’t climb down the stairs. We carried him down and as he got sicker and sicker, we started calling around to find a vet. We finally found one and we took him in and after tests she came back and told us that he had cancer and was bleeding out internally. Surgery could give him another few months, but the quality of life would be limited. We made the difficult decision to say goodbye. In one last act of agency, Luke moved off the rug and into the one spot of sunlight in the room. We called Sean so that he could say goodbye to his buddy and hearing my adult son in tears on the phone broke my heart even more. Then it was time and we positioned Luke so his head was on my leg and my daughter was facing him and we stroked him and told him what a good boy he was and that it was okay to go. We held him as his life slipped away and that was when I viscerally knew how easy it was to slip into death. One moment he was looking at us with loving eyes, then he was gone. That was the moment I truly knew the frailty of life.

While life is fragile and death can come in a heartbeat, memories and love are more resilient. Cemeteries are full of both as they are places where the living visit their dead. It should come as no surprise to me that I find peace in cemeteries as my mother plucked my birthname, Lorraine, from a gravestone. When I am agitated and feeling restless and that the latest minor disaster is the end of the world, I visit a cemetery because as I walk between the stones and read the names and dates, I feel a sense of peace wash over me as I realize that whatever I’m going through is temporary and that the people who are in the cemetery lived, they loved, and they died. Everything is transitory and that’s okay. Cemeteries are also places of love as people remember those they’ve come before with sturdy gravestones and ephemeral flowers. Cemeteries surround me with peace as I remember that I am but one link in a chain and that what truly matters is what I do during my life on earth. I need to focus on what matters and let go of that over which I have no control. While cemeteries are places of love and peace, mausoleums are places of overwhelming grief as it feels the pain and grief is trapped within their very stones. Rosehill Mausoleum is a beautiful building full of stained glass and tributes to the dead, but when I’ve walked through the two floors of death, I’ve felt a heaviness as if the pain of the living and the dead is too much to be contained.

Death is upon me now and while I don’t know if death will come in one year or six, I’ve reached the point where I’m not afraid. I know I’ve lived many lives before and that I will live many more lives, this is just one stop. I do hope that the lessons I’ve learned in this life will carry into the next.

You don’t know it yet, my dearest self, but the next 30 years or so will be filled with love, with laughter, and with joy. Be responsible and take care of all of the legal aspects of death (a will, funeral plans, etc.) so that Dr. V. will be proud of you and enjoy life. Take time to smell the flowers and don’t forget what Daddy said and make sure the people you love, know you live them.

Blessings,

Your Older Self

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